Duck, Duck, Orca

Dear Birds of the World,

Really, most of you have the wrong idea. There you are, foraging for crumbs in Central Park or diving for anchovies off the coast of Sri Lanka when you could just as easily be kicking back at Sea World -- taking advantage of soft, generous tourists and stopping by for dinner in the buckets and buckets of fresh fish that are just casually left out every few feet around the entire facility. Who needs survival of the fittest when you can dine with flamingos?

Love,
Dani